You can breathe now, football fans. Brett Favre isn’t going to the Super Bowl.

We can all imagine the endless stories about how number four came out of retirement, took the Vikings on his back and led them to the Super Bowl that would have come about had the Vikings won. They would be all over the newspapers and the Internet and we would all undoubtedly be sentenced to endless Rachel Nichols reports about him “Live from Miami.” Since the Vikings aren’t going to the Super Bowl, I promise (really) that this won’t be one of those reports.

How about that NFC Championship Game though? It started as a track meet and ended as an episode of “The Three Stooges” starring He-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named, Brad “I have less control of my team than the puppets Al Davis employs” Childress and the referees.

Childress opened the show by meekly trying to weenie his team down the field with two minutes left in regulation, only to call a timeout and then send 12 men to the huddle, pushing the Vikings out of field goal range. As far as crushingly moronic coaching moves go, that is right there near the top. (Probably second, behind the fake field goal Jim Zorn called for the Redskins on Monday Night Football against the Giants this year).

Childress’ blunder did have its benefits, as 95 percent of America (including every single Green Bay Packers fan) learned only a play later, as it set up the artist formerly known as Brett Favre (oops) to throw the game away . . . literally.

That guy whose name rhymes with Schmett Schmarve always seems to find a way to make a careless, stupid play, despite the fact that he has been in the NFL seemingly since the Stone Age and holds most every quarterback record. One of those records is for most interceptions and right on queue Big Arm Brett made a bonehead throw across his body and it was picked off, sending the game to overtime while most of the country rejoiced.

The closing act of the circus was the referees, who I won’t harp on too much, but will say that they made a few interesting calls — holding and pass interference, as well as a questionable catch — that set the Saints up for the game-winning field goal. The worst part about it all, though, was the three booth reviews in overtime, which drastically slowed down what had been a smooth, exciting game. Yes, you want the correct calls at crucial times, but Pete Morelli did not seem at all interested in overturning anything he saw and thus the game just continued at glacial speed.

All that said, on to the Super Bowl.

If you like offense — and really, who doesn’t like offense? — this will be a game for you. It pits probably the two best quarterbacks and the two most explosive offenses in the league against one another.

Peyton Manning, who may, when all is said and done, go down as the greatest quarterback to ever lace up the boots, may have had his most impressive season yet this year.

Gone was Marvin Harrison and injured was Anthony Gonzalez. The Colts’ running game was nowhere to be found most of the year. Yet Manning turned two no-names, Pierre Garçon and Austin Collie, into stars en route to winning his fourth MVP award.

Both quarterbacks, Manning and the Saints’ Drew Brees, are likely to throw the 30 or more times in the Super Bowl and I would not be shocked if the last team with the ball wins.

There are a few small factors that may help decide the game.

One is whether the Saints commit to trying to run the ball. The Colts have a very undersized defense and New Orleans can throw three running backs — Pierre Thomas, Mike Bell and Reggie Bush — at Indianapolis. If the Saints try to muscle up, they may be able to control the clock and open up the field for Brees and the play-action pass game.

A second factor is the kicking game. Kickers have only hit 60 percent of kicks in this postseason. Garrett Hartley just sent New Orleans to the Super Bowl, but he is young and his season-long field goal is 40 yards. Conversely, the Colts boast two experienced kickers, Matt Stover and Adam Vinatieri. Stover will likely do the kicking, though he is the oldest player to ever play in a Super Bowl and thus his range is questionable.

With that said, here is my fearless — and maybe careless — prediction: Saints 31, Colts 28.

Daniel Bohm will finally be forced to give up “all football, all the time” come his Feb. 7 column. Tell him you (and his editor) will gag if thus begins 20 consecutive weeks of uninterrupted baseball commentary at bohmd “at” stanford.edu.